I will try to be as clear as I can allow myself to be in recounting what happened from this point onward. I do not expect what I lived to be taken as truth—for even I can hardly trust my own battered and worn-out mind. However, with time, I have come to understand that the spirit speaks in a universal, precise language, and if interpreted properly, it can reveal to us the enigmas of the soul that dwell within the world of symbols.
Before me, solitary and monumental, a Tower was being revealed. Its structure was devoured by the dim sky, merging with the shadows of those oppressive storm clouds, giving it a dreadful and unreachable appearance— as though an abyss had opened in the heavens, and instead of looking upward, what I truly faced was a harrowing descent into the anguished depths of the unknown.
Have you ever felt, in the twilight of waking, as though you were someone else— as if another being had possessed you? Frightened, you try to identify the traits of this presence within the visceral depths of your own self.
The twilight of the heart—that aching urge to avoid desolation, the void, the absence...
Absence of light, but also of darkness.
Absence of beginning.
Absence of end.
Twilight is the hour of absences.
Absence is a hollow rooted deep in the horizon of a blurred path from which there is no escape— because that twilight lives within you.
Absence of light, but also of darkness.
Absence of beginning.
Absence of end.
Twilight is the hour of absences.
Absence is a hollow rooted deep in the horizon of a blurred path from which there is no escape— because that twilight lives within you.
I didn’t understand it then, but I could feel it… this being knew me in the most visceral way; it could protect me or destroy me at will; it was my own divinity made manifest in its wildest form— and unlike me, it was not afraid to walk the perilous path in darkness, through the twisted corridors of my spiritual labyrinth.
It knew no guilt, no remorse. It already knew what had to be done to set me free from myself— even if it meant doing so through violent and unimaginable means.
It knew no guilt, no remorse. It already knew what had to be done to set me free from myself— even if it meant doing so through violent and unimaginable means.
Because the one who cannot bear to confront himself in order to know who he is, is incapable of facing what he has created— and must seek protection from his own self.
